pestering

As bad as it may sound, kids have their own way to coerce you: pestering. “Mum, I want this! Please, please, if you don't buy it, I'll cry”.

How many times have we seen a scene like this at, for example, the shopping centre? Embarrassed by the temper tantrum thrown by their children, parents give in and end up buying him whatever he wants. This is such a successful example of pestering, the insatiable desire to get new things among kids.

Dealing with pestering may drive you crazy unless you want to and can spoil your son or daughter. But is that really the best solution? Pay attention to the following article to find out ways to change your kid's expectations.

 

Pestering: Why does he do it? 

To answer that question, maybe we should ask ourselves why we want that brand-new car that our neighbour got a couple of weeks ago. We live in the era of consumerism, where companies design marketing campaigns that target all groups of customers. Of course, that includes kids, who can easily fall in love with those colourful toys and candies shown on commercials in between their favourite cartoons. Pestering could be considered as a consequence of consumerism: Kids count on you as their only resource to keep up with trends and fads, no matter how affordable they are. In fact, one of the keys of pestering is that children don’t understand why those things they want aren’t affordable or good for them!

 

Pestering: Setting boundaries

Pester power leads to a secondary issue: the lack of personal values. Generally, kids don't understand concepts like making budgets or adapting to certain financial situations, and that's why they pressure you to satisfy their whims and their pestering. As parents, our responsibility is to set boundaries and be firm about them.... 'No' is 'no', and your kid needs to accept that, no matter how dramatic the situation gets. You can be flexible, but it's also very important that you show authority and remind him or her that, the same way you provide them with love and a safe environment to grow up in, you make the financial decisions as well. If you don’t set boundaries, your kid’s pestering could get out of control.

Instead of getting angry when facing pestering, you should try to be natural and have an open conversation with your child about why you can't get him what he wants so much. Even if he's now disappointed, such experiences may help him develop a sense of what's important in the long run and make his pestering better. In addition, this can teach him to respect everyone else's opinions, a social skill that he'll need to deal with many situations in life.

 

Pestering: Techniques to keep you both calm

The best-case scenario would be one in which your child easily gave up pestering and you didn't have to try hard to convince him, but that's a lot to expect. Being more realistic, pestering may push you over the edge, and you need to be aware of your possible reaction. That's why the first way to reduce pester power is by working on your own emotions. Here's some good advice: 

  • Don't feel bad if you can't or don't want to treat your kid with a present. The sooner he understands you aren't related to the Rockefellers, the better!
  • If pestering is getting on your nerves, you should try to relax. Don't answer right away, take deep breaths and count to 10. Then talk to him!
  • Let Dad back you up, so you are not left alone on the spot with pestering.

 

And, now, it's time for the most difficult thing; learn some techniques to fight pestering without causing conflicts between you and your kid:

  • Stick to your answers: make sure you don't budge from what you mean. If you change it, especially from 'no' to 'yes', you'll be feeding pester power. The kid gets away with it, so he'll do it again.
  • Praise your child for good and pestering-free shopping behaviour: if he doesn't ask for anything, let him know how proud of him you are. You can tell him that he's very mature for his age and 'pay him back' with alternatives, like playing with him once you get home.
  • Explain yourself: you don't need to be harsh on your son or daughter. Make sure he realises that you care about his or her feelings, even though you can't please him or her this time.
  • Reduce your kid's exposure to TV commercials and advertisements.

If the tension increases and you are in a public place, don't let the 'social pressure' affect your decisions. Your kid crying in the middle of the shopping centre may catch many people's attention, but don't feel bad. This is part of parenting and you know that, as sad as it looks, the screaming tantrum is a necessary lesson for him.

 

Despite keeping pestering under control, it's important to pinpoint that there's a happiness component revolving this issue. You want your kid to be happy, of course, yet that's not a synonym of giving him everything. He can't just depend on new toys to be content, and that's the positive message that you need to instil him.

 

Need help? Ask other mummies in CaptainMums' forum!

 

Overall Rating (1)

5 out of 5 stars

Leave your comments

Post comment as a guest

0
Your comments are subjected to administrator's moderation.

People in this conversation

  • Guest - Mrs Adeel

    Rated 5 out of 5 stars

    Thanks i found it teally useful

    Like 0 Short URL:

Activity Stream

Aksha added a reply in discussion Where I can find Wordpress the... 5 hours ago 18 minutes ago

If you want to find inexpensive Wordpress theme I can recommend to search here https://masterbundles.com/ there are many different design essentials with good prices. It can be themes, templates, fonts, icons, etc. You can find even free deals. Very useful service!...

Cherry2 added a reply in discussion Where I can find Wordpress the... 6 hours ago 22 minutes ago

What budget do you have? What is the topic of your website?...

Sancsa started a new discussion Where I can find Wordpress the... 16 hours ago 41 minutes ago

Where I can find Wordpress themes for a new blog?...

swratz added a reply in discussion What is the best recipe for co... 22 hours ago 30 minutes ago

The main thing about this kind of coffee is what the best brands of coffee are for making cold brew. Behold some of my most highly recommended choices here https://homus.org/best-coffee-for-cold-brew/...

davidwind added a reply in discussion What is the best recipe for co... 22 hours ago 32 minutes ago

Good cold brew starts with the bean and the roast style. It should really be a single origin from a mountainous region, with a light to medium roast style. I prefer all my cold brew Organic and Fair Trade too, but I digress. Make it’s a COARSE grind…that’s the best grind for cold brew to really seep into. I use 12 TBs in a quart of water to make...

Sallyford added a reply in discussion What is the best recipe for co... 22 hours ago 33 minutes ago

I got this amazing brew coffee recipe on Bachelor Recipe. Try this super easy way to make cold brew coffee. 4 cup water + 1/2 cup coffee powder Place ground coffee in a container. Now add water and stir it well. Seal container and chill 24 hours. Strain through coffee filter into a large bowl In a glass filled with ice, mix equal part coffee ...

pennyq started a new discussion What is the best recipe for co... 22 hours ago 34 minutes ago

What is the best recipe for cold brew coffee?...

pennyq added a reply in discussion How can I choose a touchless k... 22 hours ago 36 minutes ago

The latest designs also have interesting new looks such as matte black finishes and copper-based construction that truly create a unique look for your kitchen. These vintage-inspired designs have been featured in some of the hit TV remodel shows like Fixer Upper and Million Dollar Listing. But a faucet has to be more than pretty, right? Without ...

davidwind added a reply in discussion How can I choose a touchless k... 22 hours ago 38 minutes ago

The faucet is the switch of the indoor water source, take charge of control and adjust the flow rate of water, it is the material that every family must have. At present, the faucet variety of the market is various, for the average citizen, often lack professional knowledge, so when choose and buy a faucet, feel at loose from. Actually, bathroom fa...

Sallyford added a reply in discussion How can I choose a touchless k... 22 hours ago 39 minutes ago

I don’t have any personal experience with these, but I will point out a few things regarding evaluating faucets and in general in order to work, these require power. If you don’t already have spare power under your sink (no, you cannot use the power for a garbage disposal, that’s dedicated!), and you probably don’t, you either have to run a new ...

swratz started a new discussion How can I choose a touchless k... 22 hours ago 40 minutes ago

How can I choose a touchless kitchen faucets?...

ESO201722 started a new discussion Happy to obtain Rs3gold 8% off... yesterday

But cheap runescape 3 gold The Story is no "ski porn," as the film's producer Rich Tavtigian calls it: a string of eyecandy sequences on snowy slopes set to music, with no dialogue or emotional core. The film, which is playing Friday through Monday at the Maumee Indoor Theater, 601 Conant St. Just grab your gear and off you go. Big crocs are les...

Cszcy started a new discussion The Dream of Many FIFA Coins... 3 days ago

For novices: I advise you guys to purchase coins on mmogo to start well in the sport because beginning with bronze players isn't easy especially when everyone has good squads from branch 10 and also because getting coins on FIFA in the beginning might be extremely slow and discouraging. When it's completed, I advise you to read our FIFA 19 Coins...

Cszcy is now ranked up to New Member... ! 3 days ago
Cszcy started a new discussion Discover how to bat in MLB The... 3 days ago

Still, it does not quite bring Ohtani-level excitement, only because the gameplay styles, notably Franchise, have not been significantly improved or upgraded. In fact, in which Ohtani signifies the potential of a dynamic two-way The show 19 stubs player, MLB The Show 18 fits the mould of a more conventional pitcher who will pitch but not hit. It'...

Cszcy started a new discussion All eyes Are on Fortnite's Ma... 3 days ago

A few moments went by, then a rocket warped to the world only to fly and warp back out again, as though fortnite traps had been jumping between measurements. At length, a rocket flew straight up into the sky and struck the"ceiling" of this world, producing giant luminous cracks and potentially dimensional rifts. Where the real questions remain ...

5mmo started a new discussion FIFA 19' in terms of performan... 4 days ago

buy fut 19 coins Maybe there are just some games that aren't suited to consoles but I don't know that it really works vice versa. Maybe one or two new games this year. Why people would think anything different amazes me. I would have the game bundled with the upcoming Detroit: Become Human for PlayStation 4 and make it available on its own for othe...

ESO201722 added a reply in discussion Where can you find neverwinter... 5 days ago

Challenge of the Gods Event is available now, Do you get enough neverwintter astral diamonds to join it,safewow maybe the best site to buy neverwinter astral diamond with $8 voucher Best time to join in Safewow August Hot Deals I now:up to $8 cash coupon for you buying neverwinter astral diamonds PC/XBOX one/PS4 and other products on safewow fro...

ESO201722 added a reply in discussion How to gain neverwinter astral... 5 days ago

Challenge of the Gods Event is available now, Do you get enough neverwintter astral diamonds to join it,safewow maybe the best site to buy neverwinter astral diamond with $8 voucher Best time to join in Safewow August Hot Deals I now:up to $8 cash coupon for you buying neverwinter astral diamonds PC/XBOX one/PS4 and other products on safewow fro...

ESO201722 added a reply in discussion Why not to get neverwinter ast... 5 days ago

Challenge of the Gods Event is available now, Do you get enough neverwintter astral diamonds to join it,safewow maybe the best site to buy neverwinter astral diamond with $8 voucher Best time to join in Safewow August Hot Deals I now:up to $8 cash coupon for you buying neverwinter astral diamonds PC/XBOX one/PS4 and other products on safewow fro...

ESO201722 started a new discussion Where can you find neverwinter... 5 days ago

Challenge of the Gods Event is available now, Do you get enough neverwintter astral diamonds to join it,safewow maybe the best site to buy neverwinter astral diamond with $8 voucher Best time to join in Safewow August Hot Deals I now:up to $8 cash coupon for you buying neverwinter astral diamonds PC/XBOX one/PS4 and other products on safewow fro...

ESO201722 started a new discussion How to gain neverwinter astral... 5 days ago

Challenge of the Gods Event is available now, Do you get enough neverwintter astral diamonds to join it,safewow maybe the best site to buy neverwinter astral diamond with $8 voucher Best time to join in Safewow August Hot Deals I now:up to $8 cash coupon for you buying neverwinter astral diamonds PC/XBOX one/PS4 and other products on safewow fro...

ESO201722 started a new discussion Why not to get neverwinter ast... 5 days ago

Challenge of the Gods Event is available now, Do you get enough neverwintter astral diamonds to join it,safewow maybe the best site to buy neverwinter astral diamond with $8 voucher Best time to join in Safewow August Hot Deals I now:up to $8 cash coupon for you buying neverwinter astral diamonds PC/XBOX one/PS4 and other products on safewow fro...

ESO201722 started a new discussion Super sale:buy RS3gold 8% off ... 5 days ago

"The runescape 3 gold door was opened for me and I found Trotsky in the yard, feeding hay to the rabbits. I told Trotsky that I had brought an article with some very interesting statistical data on France and he invited me to his study, just as I had figured he would. We got him involved in some situations where they had to close out on him, and...

pian added a new event 6 days ago

Seo Jakarta

Disini tidak semua surat boleh dibuka, tetapi ada beberapa...

  • Tuesday, 14 August 2018 12:00 AM
  • bahams